My disclaimer before reading on:
Yes, I share my private thoughts and my life experiences in this blog along with my travels, work, furniture, exciting and not so exciting news. Along with Family and friends and our gatherings. There are a few profanity words in here. As I normally do not type that, but I just rolled with whatever came out tonight. I share all these things because God has given me the ability to type and think and write (minus poor vocab and grammar. sorry English teachers) Of which for all that I have professional editors that do an excellent job on that before I publish a story in a magazine. Anyways, as I was saying. He gave me a gift to share things like this for a reason. The reason that I THINK it is, is that it helps others in similar situations.
I normally don't care to share this with the world. Yes I know I post a lot more crap on here than furniture sometimes. But I thought I would share with you how GOD sends me powerful messages. And When I say powerful, I mean it. While in church aka the shower. I was washing my hair and that usually takes forever cuz it's long, thick, and curly. With that said. I get plenty of time to pray, and think, cry, or whatever I need to do in a calm environment without interruption.
For a little over 10 years I have been dealing with heart ache over something that I should have had patients for years back. I was not, so now I suffer the consequences on a daily, sometimes hourly minute by minute basis. I will not share the exact situation because although I broadcast to the world my LIFE, I do like to keep some things private. Hard to believe I KNOW!!!
I pray about this "situation" constantly. And when I say constantly. It's not just a day I'm having that I'm sad or hurting. It's even when I'm happy, when I'm working, etc. He has graciously given me the ability to be happy in my current situation and life. Of which I am of course. It's just this ONE darn thing I can not get past!! I've moved on in my life from being angry at people, resentment, non forgiving attitude, and just plain not understanding why GOD makes my life chaotic and stressful, down to the people I live with and am surrounded by in my community. I no longer ask him why he put me in a business, yet alone START a business as a business owner with NO MONEY or loans and grants When I have a great degree to work at a desk in corporate America. But to start a business from scratch, no overhead, and no debt, but with a shitload of worry, anxiety, hard times, months without income, broke down trucks and trailers. I realized in the last 6 months that I spent most of my early 20's in good debt and bad debt. Along with raising a child on my own as a single mother, with a mortgage, car payment, corporate job, a yard to mow weekly, laundry and all that real life junk. That I have this business with NO overhead or loans to pay, because He no longer wants me to waste my life paying back all that mess! I've already spent enough time doing that. He's fixing to give me a break through in this restoration business because I've been pretty slow. As he has already given me amazing signs and opportunities. but I keep believing and knowing my day is coming. And that comes with Little support and encouragment from family and friends. As he has already given me amazing signs and opportunities.
For instance. Some time last year about this time I recall praying hard to God and asking him if he would lead me the way to success and good people. Around Spring I set up at two shows. One being the huge Texas Antique Week in Warrenton, TX, the next being the Junk Salvation show in Austin, Texas. Two shows, back to back along with weeks away from home and staying in sleazy and disgusting hotels because I couldn't afford the fancy ones. Both shows I was stranded on the side of the road for hours. One time the radiator blew up, the next time the water pump went out. But I remember both those times when everyone told me to pack up, take my losses, and get my ass home. I refused because I knew there was a reason for me to be at these places. And I refused with a GOOD attitude and a smile and a few beers. ha ha!
One year later, I was shocked and surprised to find this in a magazine while waiting to check out at the Dollar store in Small town America Texas.
In case you are wondering what the heck I am talking about. The first picture shows my junk, my Shabby Junque Couture booth at the Junk Salvation show in Austin Texas. ON my way to that show, my SUV broke down. that's when the water pump blew. I was stranded in the heat on the side of the road for over 4 hours until a truck came and towed my broken one away. A family member saved the day by letting me borrow his truck to pull my trailer. Yes, they published a photo in the Best of Fleas section in the Spring 2013 issue. OMG! Talk about my bells and whistles whistling! Last year I Pinned a photo of Romantic Country magazine on my Pin board at www.pinterest.com "some days my dream will come true" Well what the heck do ya know? One whole year later, Here is my hard work paying off in a major USA magazine that I've been gawking at for YEARS! I've always looked into this magazine and thought to myself (because if I said it out loud everyone would just roll their eyes and laugh at me) "I'm going to BE in this magazine one day!!" God is good!
Me and the magazine my Junk is in!
And just if that wasn't exciting ENOUGH!!! this came just one month after I published my first Article in American Livestock Magazine that was titled "lust for rust, junk, and romantic lace."
You can see my ad and read the article in these two links:
Ok so those are some serious signs and a calling. so as slow as it has been, that was all just enough to get my booty back in Gear. So this past week I spent time writing a business plan for 2013 along with filling out and mailing Junk show applications across the state. so that is behind me and I've got a good pile of junk to work on for the next month or so. All to gear up for the big Spring Texas Antique week in Warrenton, Texas March 29 - April 6th 2013. More details along with my Spring flyer will be published to this blog and to www.facebook.com/shabbyjunquecouture as I settle and make everything official as far as location, location, location.
So back to what I started talking way, way above up there. I just wanted to show you an example of the signs and how amazing God works by using my magazine stuff as an example. so as I was saying. I have been dealing with a heart ache for about 10 years now. I pray constantly for God to show me the way to move away from this heart ache. Every time I pray this, some kinda crazy stuff happens, I get tweets and comments along with Facebook status updates that really puts things in perspective. I don't know. I really want to take a leap of Faith with this "situation" but as much as I rebel and take leaps of Faith....I feel really stuck right where I'm at. I already know that once I take a Leap of Faith with this thing, that my heart ache will start to heal. Even if it doesn't work out. Only because I know that means I'm taking my chance to deal with it. As mentioned about praying in the shower. I had just prayed to the Man upstairs about helping me get past this, and to give me a sign so that I know which way I need to go!!! Let me show you what happened NEXT!
got in bed and as always I checked emails, orders, the rude comments people leave, my hate mail too. cuz I get a lot of that. Not sure why as I'm pretty kind and nice to everyone and I like to enjoy my life along with others. but haters are gunna hate whether your poor, rich, happy, or not happy. so I'm just moving along and I don't let it get to me anymore.
I checked my Twitter account and here are the messages that popped up one by one each in a row one right after the other.
From @Positively Positive "Cause change and lead; accept change and survive; resist change and die. - Ray Norda"
From @joycemeyer "God has a more awesome plan for your life than you could ever imagine simply because He loves you!"
From @Positively Positive "Writing yourself a Love Letter."
From @positively Positive "courage is the power to let go of the familiar. - Raymond Lindquist"
FRom @etsy "there's something fishy going on here, but I'm cool with it."
From @joelosteen "God has brought you too far to leave you where you are. He has something great in your future."
From @positively Positive "to succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone, and a funnybone." -Reba McEntire
From @positively positive "rather than a "bucket list," How About "my crazy Bliss adventures list"
I guess what I'm trying to share with you and show you...that there are some serious strong signals here. He's dealing with me for sure..and he knows it's time I took care of it. but First Mommy and wifey duty have to be number one. But that day is coming and this for sure is a sign to DO it! the hardest part is being torn from loving the Mommy job, but yet wanting to take that leap of Faith! So until he shows me a sign of how I can DO IT as a mother....I must stay put where I am for now!
Hope everyone enjoyed their Holidays? We were all sick here, so I didn't get a Christmas gathering until last night. I've spent the last week and a half at urgent care centers and the pediatrician office. And seeing I will be home playing with the kids tomorrow night while the rest of America goes out to celebrate...I made it a memorable one. Here are a few photos from last night's get together.
The two people you see in this photo with me are my good life long friends. the dude on your right flew in from Charlotte, NC where he works as an Engineer to visit his family in town and me of course. Classmates from kindergarten thru high school and college. All earning the same degree in the same civil engineering profession. And still the closest of friends! That's fantastic!!
This hot little Salsa Momma has become my closest most cherished friend. She also cleans my house. Her husband is in the picture above this one to your left.
and below, she was being silly behind my back!
I'm itching to wear my gorgeous red dress somewhere. But that looks like it won't happen this Winter as the Man of the house and I NEVER go out on the town. Even with my birthday being 2 weeks away. So either someone else will have to take me out, or I'm going to wear that long sleeve thing with my BIG GIRL azz Kickin' boots to Antique week sweating my rear off and let everyone else EAT their heart out! But pretty sure it's going to roll more like this: On a bored cold day, fix hair, put red lips on, slap that little red dress on and get my 4 year old to photograph me with my iphone. yeah pretty sure how it's going to go down.
Thank you for visiting!!! Hope it did some inspiring for whoever needed it!
-XOXO
Crystal
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